Yeah, He had his first cigarette. All the preparation was done. He made tea, looked at the balcony and checked the snow. Took the time by studying the cigarette as if he was the holding it for the first time. The bathroom's exhaust fan sound could be heard, where he was taking a look at himself in front of the mirror. Checking himself how he looked with the cigarette in his mouth and how he would hold the cigarette. This made him much more excited.
While the tea was being made, he thought to himself whether he was going to smoke for the sake of fun or for his own pleasure. The answer was not found. The urge to smoke was way back from April. The reason he didn't smoke till date after this urge, was not just because there wasn't a chance but it was all about to find where this intention to smoke had to come from. He kept on asking himself whether it was because the loneliness, the people he knew, the movies, the society he moved in & out or was it a combination of all them.
He coughed. He coughed continuously no matter whether it was a small or big drag of nicotine. Still it was exciting even when he felt the dizziness and enjoyed the cold out in the balcony along with his tea. He could taste the nicotine and even the smoke but wouldn't say he enjoyed it.
He came inside, closed the balcony door and sat on the couch. He was expecting to answer himself after his first smoke whether he had missed this opportunity to start smoking a long while back and then decided he couldn't interpret nothing much from his first cigarette. The only point that he couldn't get to a conclusion was on differentiating whether he was blowing out smoke or was it just the air coming out from his mouth in the freezing cold.
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